Extended comments on No More Goodbyes
 

 
    I recently received a copy of your book, signed by you, from my Mom with a note attached.  It was the first time I have felt in my heart that my Mom really meant it when she wrote "I love you very much."  I have never doubted that my Mom has loved me but I don't think she ever understood what it was like for me to be gay, until now. 
      I have only been able to survive the last ten years by developing a hatred for the church; and, reading your book has made me think a lot, but like I told my Mom, "I wish more people in the church felt the way Carol Lynn does."  "Well," she said, "that's why I'm getting everybody I know to read the book."  I just wanted to let you know that you have an enormous impact on me and my family and I am so grateful for you and what you have done. You are a great healer and I thank you so much for caring enough about me, and all the other "me's" in the world, to write this book.  -J.

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    In the big view (if I can muster it) I do believe that you have been inspired and are inspired for this remarkable work of yours. Of yours and Gerald's I should say. Of yours and all of those wonderful good spirits who have suffered and died almost in vain were it not for you and this new book, No More Goodbyes.
     For me, through all the pain of the stories you have told and conveyed, one message stands out clearly: think and create for yourself. You have done a magnificent job, however, of giving voice to the beleaguered and voiceless for that is what all those are who will not or cannot yet comprehend their own freedom to choose what they will for their life. Though with a voice they are voiceless, beleaguered indeed, and too often tormented. To me then what you are doing is a very great task of giving: giving people back to themselves. The larger message of your new and magnificent tome is, indeed, that people must think and create for themselves. Otherwise only disaster awaits them, especially if they are gay.
     Best of all Carol Lynn is that your book is sure to bring about change so that in the future no child will spring forward onto the railing of an overpass and back-flip himself into the path of an oncoming truck. What an image, one I shall never forget! That alone was worth the price of admission to all the stories you have told. Actually, adding up the entire cumulative effect, I have never read anything so powerfully validating of homosexual lives and life as is No More Goodbyes. That gay people should simply be left alone can be the only ultimate conclusion to be drawn from your book. It has no business being an issue of any sort. As Bobby's mother said, there was nothing wrong with him. Nothing but that they both believed in lies. What a tragedy.
     I think your book is going to be a great success - I'm sure of it.  It is so good. -Barry

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I am currently reading No More Goodbyes.  I joined the Mormon Church almost 3 years ago now as a 43 year old woman with a good husband and 2 wonderful small children.  I am not gay nor is my husband or anyone else in my family that I am aware of.  I joined the church because I felt the spirit so strongly that it was the right thing to do.  Soon after joining, I became aware of the churches position on gays and marriage.  I grew up in Berkeley in a fairly “liberal” family and consider myself somewhat of an activist for equal rights for all.  I was disturbed by the churches stance.  When I presented my concerns to members of my ward in private, I have been met with disapproval and warned that it was Satan trying to push me away from the church.  I considered this but could not shake the feeling that the church is wrong on this.  My husband is not a member of the church although he supports me.  I have also been told that if he does not join the church, our family will not be sealed for eternity.  I cannot believe that a loving God would not see things differently.  After reading your book….I know that my feelings are correct.  I do not want to “throw out the baby with the bath water”.  As 1st counselor to the RS president in the ____ Ward, I feel that maybe I have the opportunity to teach a new way of seeing.  I thank you for your work…..and I know that Love will conquer all.  -P, California

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     One of your advance copies of No More Goodbyes landed in my lap here in rural Iowa.  I look forward to its public release, as I intend to buy a copy for my parents and all my siblings.  Perhaps they will not read it right away, but at least they will have it when they come to a time when they can read such things.
     You told my story again and again in the book. The details are different, but the main story line is the same--knew I was gay from age three, heard myself condemned all through my youth, put a gun to my head at age 18 and am still here by the sheer chance of the gun malfunctioning, confessed to my bishop before my mission and was "repaired" by the church and then
instructed never to mention it again as it was a part of my past. Married for 18 years (five children, three still living). High Councilman, bishop's counselor, branch president, etc. Agony of seeing a lovely woman go through the devastation of learning I had kept a secret from her all those years. Joy of finding the man of my dreams and forging a life with him and finally feeling normal for the first time in my life. Frustrations as family struggles to adapt to the new situation. Guilt over seeing my wife alone and sad. Guilt over not being there to see my children daily. Inner struggle of becoming increasingly a disbeliever in any religion or creed. 
     None of that really matters. What matters is that you wrote the book. If you can prevent one young man or woman from suicide, or prevent another mixed orientation marriage from taking place, you will have done a great work.  I wish my wife could visit with you (I'm tempted to send her on a retreat to your home with her mother and sisters), but she doesn't want to hear a point of view that differs from what she has been taught all her life. She doesn't want to hear that her church leaders counseled a young gay man to marry and raise a family. So I fear she will never get the support she needs, for she wishes to remain in the culture of shame, and that shame causes her to remain the most closeted of all.
     Yours is a vital voice--a voice from within the church. I appreciate the fact that your voice is not a bitter one, but rather one of gentle love yet firm counsel. Too many have become bitter and angry, and their voices cannot effect a change as yours can.
Keep speaking for us, please! There are so many future generations who do not need to suffer the indignities that we went through.  Thank you again for a wonderful book. It cannot reach the bookstore shelves quickly enough! 
-Iowa

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     It would be redundant to wish you good luck, you don’t need it. But, hopefully the prayers of so many who love and appreciate you so will mean something to you and you will feel added strength in them. So may of us, just plain old families embarking on a new and mysterious adventure together will always bless the name of our sweet Carol Lynn for making the path a little less thorny and a little less alone for us. The book turned out to be so poignant and wonderful, I think it will help so many, teach so many, and make so many feel things they never thought they would feel.
     Our family stands with all of the other families to pay tribute to you and to call down blessings upon your head, that you may be able to recognize the great good you do and have done.  As for our house, we love you, and thank you for giving us a voice to speak the words we needed to say as a family at this time. If one mother is able to recognize herself in my story and feel less alone and have a little more hope, whatever tiny risk we may have thought we undertook at first, is more than rewarded and gives me great joy.
     It will be wonderful to stand back and watch amazing things transpire as your beautiful words and feelings are shared with whomever is willing to hear them.
     Through people like you, and even Me (!), through the voices of fathers, sons, mothers, sisters, grandmothers, comes the singular voice of a family. And always, there is more strength and love in the family unit than can be duplicated anywhere on earth.  With all my love, -S.

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     I have been reading "No More Goodbyes" since I received it a couple of days ago.  The story of Stuart's suicide redefined for me a particularly important moment in my life, which I do not revisit and have not really discussed with anyone.  ...my 27th birthday, was the day I had determined to take my life after a year and a half of unsuccessful reparative therapy.   I had an epiphany late that day that I've never been able to fully articulate, but you did.   I finally had the idea crystalize in my head during the last possible moments that my clear choice was between the Church and life.  It was that simple.  As you so eloquently stated, at that moment I chose life.  I grabbed my soul and ran out the doors of the Church as fast as I could, without looking back.  I will forever be grateful to the source of that inspiration.  I'm sure my parents would be too, even though at the time they would probably have been relieved if I had followed through with my intent.
|     Time heals, and life heals.  Your work will result in much more time and life, and more healing than you will ever know.  -F.

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     I was ordained to be a bishop when I was 30 years old. I was unprepared for my most difficult challenge.   I will tell you that my experience as a bishop changed my life, but not in the way I expected. I believe that in sacred moments, I came to know the hearts of men who struggled with being gay Mormons. I came to understand them, heart to heart, and soul to soul. I became absolutely convinced that being gay is no more a choice than I have chosen to have brown eyes, or I am in the process of choosing to go bald.
     I came to believe that the church doctrine on the issue was not just wrong, but dangerous. It locked people in awful cycles of self-loathing by teaching the false doctrine that if these men only had a greater desire to change, they would. If they prayed harder, more sincerely, read more scriptures, hummed more hymns in their head to drown out evil thoughts, they would then be changed. Or worse, if they married a good woman, their "unnatural" desires would vanish, and they would live happily ever after. And so they hoped and prayed and read and hummed and received priesthood blessings and hated themselves for remaining unchanged.
     I read the official direction given to bishops on the subject. None of it made sense. It didn't fit with what I was seeing. More important, it didn't fit with what I was feeling...what I believed were spiritual promptings teaching love and tolerance. Promptings which I believed taught me that these were His children, and they were not some awful mistake or aberration, but children who were loved just as they are.  -B.

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          I feel like I know you personally. I read your book, Goodbye, I love you when I first came out. It was a tremendous help to both my ex-wife and myself.
          I purchased two copies of No More Goodbyes, one for my parents as a Christmas gift and one for myself. I really feel it will help my parents in accepting themselves for raising two gay sons. I know that my mother has often felt like a failure due to many of the things said to her by church leaders. I am one of the fortunate one's who's parents, after some time, have grown to support me regardless of my sexual preference. Their only request is that I am happy.
          Your book is great in showing there are other families in the church who have this same struggle, yet support their family members. My goal now is to have my partners parents read the book.   –R.

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         I'm about half way through No More Goodbyes.  My older brother is gay…  He has just begun his life of dating and being openly gay….  I appreciate your book and your openness.  I've always supported and loved my brother, along with the rest of my family, but your book is helping me to understand him and his lifelong situation a little better.  The best thing I have been and can continue to be for him is just a supportive friend and brother…  He's one of my best friends and your book played a major part in saving his life.  He was heading down the road all too many gay and lesbians feel forced to take.  Your book was the first to shed a different light, a light someone could live by, not measure themselves by.  It's strange how God can use the sad and hurtful memories of the past and turn them into something so beautiful and helpful to so many.  –Utah

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          My story is similar to so many of those that you shared in your book, in fact I felt a part of myself in most of your stories. My story very nearly ended in suicide at one particularly empty time in my life not long ago, but thanks to a number of blessings in my life I'm now learning to see my situation from a more hopeful perspective. I've learned that it's ok for me to separate myself from the church just enough for me to develop some form of self-confidence and a healthy identity.
          Thank you for the selfless work you do to make people like me finally find that hope in life. More importantly, thank you for your valiant efforts to help family and friends of gay Mormons understand our plight in a way that I never thought would be possible. In many ways, one of the most difficult aspects of this trial for me has been feeling like a black sheep, or an outcast among people I love most. I cannot even begin to describe how wonderful it is to suddenly have support and understanding and good people fighting on my side. -J.

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            I just finished reading your book "No more goodbyes" and I guess I felt the need to say thank you for being a voice of reason and compassion in a culture of nonsense and fear.
            I think it is so sad that we teach our youth or rather have our youth covenant at baptism "to bear one another's burdens" only to also quietly and subversively teach them an entirely different message regarding gay and lesbian members….  It is sad that members need to go elsewhere to feel part of a community of Christ.  It is time that the members of the Mormon faith know that they can reconcile their experiences with their faith openly at church and not feel ashamed about the truth or how they feel…. 
            You are and have been generating a healthy and honest dialogue that is long overdue.  -L. Utah

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          Flights between NYC, Hong Kong, Malaysia, Thailand and back flew by because I was lost in your book. And several times I had to turn my head away from strangers in nearby seats that saw me crying, and sometimes weeping, because of the stories you shared. I found myself actually trying to read more slowly, so I could make the experience last longer.
          It took me 40 years to come to terms with who I am. I lived for 40 years as a celibate man, alone, and trying to be the best Mormon boy/man I knew how to be. I didn't make the mistake of marrying--although I came close but knew it would have been under false pretenses--and I have no hurt feelings towards the Church, although I'm not active right now.
          I came out to my parents this past Christmas--the hardest thing I've ever done--even at my advanced age. They were loving and caring--much more so than I ever thought they'd have the capacity to be given their strong position towards the Church.
          You really are doing a special thing. Thanks a lot. -B. N.Y.

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          Today I'm on vacation and a friend of mine gave me your recent published book "No More Goodbyes". As I turned the first few chapters, I couldn't put it down and kept reading it until the last page.
          I recall those afternoons thumbing through your books at Deseret Book Store in downtown Salt Lake. Your words and many others' stories had actually saved my life.
          [As an Asian], It took me a lot to join the LDS church and serve a mission.... I too thought that my sexuality could be changed if I stayed active and did my best to serve the Lord.
          From a very young age, I knew I was attracted to guys but I also knew it was forbidden....  I still believe in God and know He listens to me. I was also very devastated to know I couldn't be changed; I know there must be a reason. I believe God can change a person's sexuality if He wants to but He doesn't do it that way.
          And one thing I want to point out is: why should we, gay people, have to feel sorry for ourselves? Why does one have to care so much about others' criticism? If we know everyone is equal in the eyes of the supreme being, then there should be no fear in every thing we encounter in life.
          I'm not sure whether your books reach...Asian members but I know there are many that need your words and works. I'm lucky to know English and really, my attempt to taking my own life was hindered by your books.
          Thank you very much! Hope your works will be read by many others in the LDS church in Asia and influence people with more positive thought toward gay Mormons. -Asia
 

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     My story is probably quite the same as many others.  However when I came out two weeks ago all I have been receiving is LOVE LOVE LOVE!  My parents have been supportive.  My father was talking to me yesterday and cried the entire time telling me how much he loved me.  I think my parents are more stressed about the change than I am.
     In fact the moment I decided that it was time to stop fighting my attractions I found instant peace and happiness within myself and with God.  Upon looking at all the events that transpired to this point I can testify that God has led me right where I need to be.  I feel his spirit with me constantly and am so grateful for his support and love in my life.  I am a disciple of my Lord Jesus Christ and feel I have a mission to do on this Earth while being gay.
     Your book is amazing, you helped me see through other's stories and your own that it would have been a huge mistake to have gotten married to "cure" myself.  Yikes, thanks for the save…. 
     I love you with all my heart for your boldness and love.  I thank you for your book. 
     Your newest friend.  -A

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Your new book was so powerful for my parents, as was your play, Facing East. They gave me my own autographed copies. Now that I've finally finished, I am filled with such gratitude -- to you for doing what you've done, but mostly to God for how incredibly blessed I am.
            I read your book, and I realized I am one of the lucky ones. I and my family have definitely had our ups and downs, our rough patches. Three years when we barely spoke to one another. But my parents have now redrawn the family circle, and my partner and I are firmly in the middle, unconditionally loved, and fiercely defended.
            …Now, after finishing your wonderful, beautiful, hopeful book, I have another image in my mind's eye. My partner and I will not die of suicide, we will not die of AIDS, we will not die alone. We will die at the end of long lives full of love and holiness and service, long lives of helping to gather in all the lost ones, making sure that there will be none at the gates of the Celestial Kingdom left without someone to speak for them, without someone to say, "No, you can't leave this person out, because he's a part of my family, she belongs to us."  -J
 

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          Thank you again for the wonderful words and also for that wonderful book No More Goodbyes.  I gave my friends (a wonderful gay couple)…a copy of your book about 3 days ago.  I spoke with [John] last night and he said that [Joe] has been reading that book practically non-stop since he opened it 2 days ago.  [John] said he has never seen [Joe] so emotionally moved in his life.  [Joe] is a big, muscular, very attractive young man…who often acts like a typical American Jock…  He doesn't show his emotions much, but [Joe] said he has been shedding a lot of tears since he began reading your book. 
          I know a lot of gay people who have either left the LDS Church or are not that active (due to the rejection they have received from some Church leaders, members and some teachings) who hunger deeply for the spiritual connection they once had.  Your book offers an immense amount of healing balm to gay people and our families and friends.  To me your book is a great blessing in that you listened to the Holy Spirit and what was given has been an offering that has the power to change our society, building bridges, healing wounds and erasing divides that are so deep due to the gay/church issue.  –B.

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            I read your book the floodgates opened and I found myself turning page after page with tears running down my face. I grew up in a good Mormon family on a farm…. Since high school, I've been living, and suffering endlessly, with the secret that I am gay. Just typing the word "gay" seems surreal. For so many years I fought this "urge" or my "condition", believing if I didn't call it by name or face it directly it would be less real, less painful.
            Your book and the stories of so many people who walked the same path I now travel has given me courage to face each day knowing that I am not alone and less afraid of who I am. I'm so tired of living in the shadows, of putting up a cheerful, happy facade when really I ache inside. I want an honest, open relationship with my family. Until last night, I didn't think I would ever tell them for fear of shaming or disappointing them.  Now I believe that we can work through this, and that our family will survive my "secret" and perhaps be stronger and closer because of it. They'll also finally have an answer to why their smart, successful son and brother is __ years old and still not married!
            Thank you for putting me on the path to healing and helping me find my self-worth.  If your travels ever take you to ___, please give me a call. You'll always receive a warm welcome in my home!
            God Bless! 

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I've recently purchased your two books:  "Goodbye, I Love You" and "No More Goodbyes: Circling the Wagons Around Our Gay Loved Ones."  I want you to know that I am a gay man of almost 56 years of age with a religious evangelical past rather than that of being Mormon.  I love your writing and sharing from your heart!  I too was married and fathered a son who is now 22 years old.  I ended up contracting HIV after marriage of 9 years, ending in divorce.  I too also shared my sexual past with my to-be wife, but we too had faith that I would change as long as I remained faithful to God.  By the time I got to the end of your book, the last few pages brought me to absolute tears!  I sat next to my partner…and shared the story with him, reading the last few pages aloud, but I couldn't read but a few words or so without totally losing it, shedding many tears.  Thanks for sharing your story, as I could very much identify.  You are truly a gift to the world at this time and place…  Thank you, thank you, thank you!  -H.

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          Thank you so much for "No More Goodbyes". For years I've been trying to develop a working philosophy of the Gay question, and with the help of your book, I feel like I'm finally getting there.
          Like I told a daughter - it did a serious opening job on my mind.
          The part that I've had the hardest time accepting is that homosexuals are born that way - it just seemed so unfair. But now I'm realizing it is no more unfair than the way anyone is born. I've often thought it wasn't fair for some people to be born so beautiful and talented. I think I believed that I had to understand the how and why's of the condition to be able to accept it, but your stories have helped me realize that the real issue is learning to accept and love the people. If there is a cause for it somewhere, I'd be interested in knowing it, but I no longer have a need to understand it, before I accept it.
          Thank you. Love, -M.

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I just recently finished reading No More Goodbyes at the request of my younger brother, who told the family he is gay about 6 months ago.  While disowning him, or turning away from him was never an option in my book, I still have struggled with a lot of questions.  I wasn't going to write you this email because I figured you get so many, but I need to tell you how grateful I am that you don't shy away from such an important subject.
          I have really been struggling with what I know to be true about the gospel and what I know to be true about my brother, which includes the fact that he is not, nor was he ever, evil.  I don't know where the two beliefs connect.  This is where your book comes in.  I had a very difficult time reading it, to be honest.  My brother spent many years trying to make himself disappear through various forms of self-abuse due to his homosexuality, and the possibility of suicide was very much there.  However, you addressed the fact that my responsibility comes in loving my brother regardless of anything else.  I don't really need to understand the missing link right now.
          I am thanking you for using your experiences, and the experiences of others to remind us that this is a gospel of love and mercy above all.  I have never believed homosexuality was a choice.  Who would wake up one day and say, "Yes, I think I would like to be ostracized from everything I hold dear.  I will be gay"?  I spent many years believing that I was in direct opposition to the teachings of the gospel in this belief, but your book helped me realize that the gospel has been interpreted many ways, and there are many things we do not and will not understand in this life.  My testimony is still intact AND I love my brother, if possible, more than ever for his courage.  Anyway, I have gone on long enough, but I just wanted to thank you and I am going to begin reading Goodbye, I love You.  - M

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 I just finished reading No More Goodbyes and wanted to thank you personally for writing such a wonderful book and for all the work you are doing for this world and especially for people like me. Yes I am gay, 21 years old, and just recently decided on not serving a mission and working on finding my place in this world….
            I love the passage from NMG on page 61 when you said, "No one can play the part you or I came to play. Move toward the light here. Claim life. Claim love. Be love. Reach out. Trust. Trust tonight. Trust tomorrow. Trust yourself. Walk with me. Let's all walk together."  I find that passage so encouraging, so full of love, that I don't know how any person reading can not want to go out and do all they can for those who are suffering.  I look forward to the day where we can all walk hand in hand, in love and friendship on this earth, and go forth spreading peace.  Thanks again, from the bottom of my heart for your words, for your commitment to others in this world and for your stand for peace, for love.  -M

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            We are reading it [No More Goodbyes] together [my mom and I], though separately, "on accident" and are talking about it!  We talked for three hours about a subject she is usually very uncomfortable with and she seemed peaceful.  It was amazing!....  We talked…about the possibility of my Mom starting a book club in her ward and using this as the book and people I am out to that I know would be supportive to her…. It was awesome.  At the end, I asked her, "I know the book is hard, but are you getting anything good out of it?"  Then I was quiet and waited, which was hard to do.  She said slowly, "Yeah, I think so."  She continued, "It has made me look this in the face.  I think for me, I knew (I had told her many times), but there was always that hope.  Now that's gone and I'm just facing it."  It was really good to hear her saying that.  I think it also will help her to deal with me finally having someone in my life.  God is REALLY good to me!
            Anyway, thank you for writing a courageous book and living a courageous life and doing some "radical" things!   -J

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Dear Carol Lynn,
I just finished your new book, No More Good-byes.
I loved it.
I love you.
It is interesting to me that although I received it quite a while ago, I only felt compelled to read it as I am starting to prepare for my Relief Society lesson on Strengthening Families.
I will be coming out to my Relief Society as a supporter of homosexuals and  their families in particular and all people who struggle and their families, in general. 
You give me hope for living the gospel God's way, which often seems at odds with the Mormon way. I so often feel I am on this road alone.
I don't have any major issues that make me feel that way.  Mainly, just my personal observations.
Sometimes I think it would be easier to stop going to church, but I so know it is true and I always think... Mormons need love too.
Must go now.
But, thank you, thank you, thank you.
Love,  -L.

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      "No More Goodbyes" has significantly shifted our family dynamics. My mom, after reading it, called and apologized for abandoning me. "We just didn't know what to do," she said. I understand, of course -- they hadn't been given any more guidance on the issue than I had, and they were simply doing the best they could within their Mormon context at the time. My aunt read it and told me it was one of the best books she'd read in a long time. She gave a copy to each of her siblings for Christmas, and my uncle -- after reading his -- took me aside an apologized for his past attitudes towards gay people. "I was homophobic ... I didn't know anything about it," he said, "but I know you. And I know you're a good person!" He has prepared a statement defending gay people any time it comes up in church. More recently, another aunt whom I hadn't seen in 15 years, came up to me and expressed regret for not being there for my parents and me when I came out. She has a son she suspects is gay, and she's since joined P-FLAG and is doing everything she can to support gay Mormon youth in her area -- all within months of returning from a mission with her husband.
          My family is healing, and I feel as though the wagons have moved out to bring me back into the circle. I simply can't thank you enough for your efforts.  -J.

 

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Dear Ms. Pearson:
            I recently began reading your book No More Goodbyes, and I felt it wrong to go another
chapter before offering my deepest gratitude for what you have done for me.
            I've known practically my entire life that I am gay, and accepting that fact was not the easiest of tasks. I distinctly remember towards the end of primary thinking "I don't think these songs include me." After years of struggle, I came out to my family and friends at the age of sixteen. The resulting struggle between my mother and me over my salvation has waged ever since, pushing me further from the church and my family.
            She (my mother) recently approached me with a copy of No More Goodbyes, which I promptly tossed aside without so much as a glance, thinking "Who is this woman, and what does she think she can do for me?" Armed with a whopping nineteen years of wisdom, I foolishly thought myself the wiser on the subject. It wasn't until later, when asking a friend his opinion on No More Goodbyes, that I decided to indulge my mother and read what I thought at the time was her latest spiritual propaganda.
            Last night, I held the book close to me and wept for the other boys who've lost hope in this life.  Blurry eyed, I read through the midnight hours till arriving at the final paragraph of the chapter All Our Sons. I cannot describe the peace this book has brought into my mind and my heart. My mother and I have now agreed to trade No More Goodbyes and In Quiet Desperation when we finish them. Your work has helped to open a warmth and familiarity within myself towards my family and church that I had long since thought lost.
            May God bless you for the beautiful service you have done for me, my friends, my family, the families of others, the church, and the world.
            Sincerely, -G

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Carol Lynn:
            I just placed an order for three copies of No More Goodbyes and one of Facing East….  
I can't tell you how grateful I am to have discovered No More Goodbyes
            My family was inactive, but I became active in high school when friends encouraged me to go to seminary.  I ended up loving what I learned and eventually was called to be seminary president during my senior year in 1979. 
            But then I came across a church pamphlet; I think it was titled "To The One", but I'm not sure.  As I read it, I realized that I was The One he was writing to!  I remember words like ugly, perverted, debased used to describe me.  But I also remember reading that if I prayed and was righteous and spiritually worthy, I could change.
            Well, my story is repeated over and over in your book, so I won't bore you with the details, but in 2003, at age 42, I was depressed and to the brink of suicide when the thought popped into my head that maybe--just maybe--what I had read was.... wrong!
            Thanks to good people in my life (including you), I've been able to gradually remove all the filters that I'd been viewing the world through for the past 25 years.  I now realize there's nothing wrong with me.
                    -T

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Dear Carol Lynn:
         Three months ago yesterday my brother came out of the closet about his homosexuality.  I didn't know how to react.  When it came to that subject, I was very naive.  The only experiences I've had with homosexuality were negative….  I have been scared and hurt.  My husband bought me your two books for Christmas, "Goodbye, I Love You," and "No More Goodbyes."  I've already finished them both.  I cried, I laughed, I cried, and I feel so much better!  I no longer feel afraid.  I don't know what the future will hold for my brother, nor what the eternities hold for him, but I do know that I will be there for him.  As soon as I finished the second book, I wrote him a letter.  I don't think I had closed the door on our relationship, but I wanted him to KNOW that it was wide open.  Thank you for helping me to see with a little more understanding, and love.  Thank you for sharing your experiences.  I can't wait to pass your books along to my parents and siblings, who are still struggling tremendously.  -B
 

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Dear Carol Lynn,
          Happy  New Year!  I had an experience this weekend I just had to share with you.  [We] went to the funeral of a very dear friend.  While there we ran into an old acquaintance.  This man is very prominent in the SL
community and a very good member of the church having held a number of responsible calling through the years.
          He said to me, "… I read the book No More Good-Byes, and I tell you it has changed the way I see gay people.  I have a cousin who is gay and have not been the nicest person to him.  I decided to call him.  I told him
that I know I have not been the kindest person to you, but I want you to know that I apologize for this and ask your forgiveness."  They then went out to dinner and…have started a new relationship, because of the way the book touched him.
          I needed to share that with you.  You are making a difference in this world, one person at a time, through your book.  Thank you for your example.
          Regards, A.

 

 

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